Why's That Cop Always Sitting Right There?

BECKLEY — “I’m tellin’ ya, it doesn’t matter what time of day it is,” Bill Taylor told a Ramp Reporter. “They are always there. I’m starting to wonder what it is my tax dollars are paying for.”

Our staff investigated several reports of that same cop just lurking there, acting sketchy as hell.

“Honestly, it’s not like I’m speeding or breaking the law or something, it just freaks me out. I’m over here checking my speedometer and tapping my brakes and shit.” Taylor said. “The parking lot is creepy as fuck, as it is. The cop is always behind that building that’s all dilapidated and burned or something — so I’m already on edge.”

At press time, the Chief of Police confirmed that, “That spot is menacing, I know. There’s certainly something sinister about it. That’s why we have an officer out there — for our protection. It just has an Aura about it that I really don’t vibe with.”

Residents look forward to the possibility of that one ghost hunting show from The History Channel may be filming an episode there.