MENLO PARK, CA – Facebook–that place my dad goes to share racist, boomer memes–announced that the organization, founded in 2004, will change their name to The Loud. The fake news website that has expedited the divide and demise of our civilization is basically going to be the same fucking thing except with a different logo.
Ramp reporters sat down to get some insight from the founder of Impact Media, Garrett Adkins, who is pretty much the fuckin’ Jerry Garcia of social media and marketing. Adkins says, “It’s certainly a power move, especially on the boomers, as they tend to not be in favor of loud things. It’s a desperate attempt to make Facebook seem cooler to Gen Z.”
This announcement comes on the heels of a beloved local music venue that recently changed their name to The Loud, which begs the question: Huh? The name is a bit on the nose for a music venue, but even stranger so for a social media platform. Was the Zucc taking notes? The Loud would be a more appropriate name for TikTok, or at least that’s how I feel when my wife is watching those damn things in bed and keeping me up all night! HEYOO!
We spoke with Mark Zuckerberg at his barbecue over the weekend because we’re friends with him in real life, and he didn’t even mention the name change. But he typically doesn’t like to bring work to the BBQ. The man needs to focus on smoking them meats. Put a little Sweet Baby Rays on them bitches and you’re cookin’ with gas!
So everyone make sure you’re following The Ramp News on The Loud, because we’re just as active on there as we are on Twitter and Instagram. Boy, do we love posting! We like it on The Loud because a lot of boomers don’t understand what real journalism is. They don’t really like to “google” or “fact-check” or “read”. We believe this rebranding could also prove beneficial for us, and we’re thinking about changing our name to The Loud.
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